This is a simple little contest inspired by hollowleviathan and Riko's ramblings in IRC. What I'm looking for are famous quotes--be it from a movie, poem, book, whatever. In the quote, substitute an aspect of The Nethernet! Here are some examples:

hollowleviathan: I've got a feeling we're not in the nethernet anymore.

riko: To crush your enemies, to see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of their DP

zous: Now, this is a story all about how my DeePs got flipped, turned upside down, and I'd like to take a minute just sit right there, I'll tell you how I became the Ping of a town called PMOG

riko: Ask not what DP can do for you; ask what you can do for DP

Got a general idea? You can either make it a serious quote or a funny one, doesn't matter what. I will pick my personal favorite and award that person 5k DP. If I happen to get a lot of entrants, I may ask for additional judges as well (as well as expand the pot).

...

Well, what are you waiting for? Post some quotes!

EDIT: I meant to say, enter as many times as you'd like! However, I would prefer that you put all of your quotes in the same post, so it's easier to find who said what. Thanks!

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The current pot is 25,000 DP!

Thanks to these people for donations!

riko - 2,000
ghastlymcnasty - 5,000
nitwit88 - 5,000

Better to be king for a night than shoat for a lifetime.
___________

We don't make missions, we make missions better.
___________

I've seen the future, and it is bacon-shaped.
___________

Have you had your DP today?
___________

All the world's a nethernet and all the men and women merely pmoggers.
___________

And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy my watchdogs.
___________

I'm going to make him a mission he can't refuse.
___________

You had me at evercrate.
___________

Say hello to my little bnick!
___________

Get your stinking nicks off me, you damned dirty 'lantes!
___________

The world will look up and shout "Save us!" and I will whisper "Shoats."
___________

Feelins'? Look mate, you know who has a lot of feelings? Blokes what bludgeon their wives to death with a golf trophy! Vigilantes have standards. Be polite. Be efficient. Have a plan to St. Nick everyone you meet.
___________

I am a level 20 destroyer, and *this* is my weapon. She weighs 150 kilograms and fires 200 DP custom-tool grenades at 10,000 rounds per minute. It costs 400,000 DP to fire this weapon for twelve seconds.
___________

War. War never changes.

The end of PMOG occurred pretty much as we had predicted. Too many pmogians, not enough DP or tools to go around. The details are trivial and pointless, the reasons, as always, purely shoat ones.
___________

It's a Joe awful small affair
To VA with the mousey hair
But Riko is yelling, "No!"
And Daddy has told her to go

But her st. nick is nowhere to be seen
Now she walks through stumbleupon
To the site with the clearest view
And she's dogging the silver screen

But the mission is a webcomic bore
she's already seen it ten times or more
She could spit in the eyes of shoats
As they ask her to focus on

Bedouin fighting in the dance hall
Oh man! Look at those destroyers go
It's the freakiest show

Take a look at the vigilante
Beating up the wrong guy
Oh man! Wonder if he'll ever know
He's in the best selling show
Is there life on PMOG?

"Hello. My name is Jerdu Gains. You naded my father. Prepare to die."

"I am Ninefinder, Human-Cyborg relations. And this is my counterpart, Jerdu Gains!"

(Yes I just called Jerdu a metallic midget.)

"Speak softly and carry a shitload of 'nades."

"NOBODY expects the explosive acquisition!"

"When you're a Det, you're a Det all the way
From your first yellow mine to your last dying day!
When you're a Det, let 'em Nick what they can
You've got comrades around, you're a family man!
You're never alone,
You're never disconnected!
You're home with your own
When vigilantes are expected-
You're well protected!
Then you are set
With a capital D,
Which you’ll never forget
Till they cart you away.
When you’re a Det,
You. Stay. A. Det!

When you’re a Det,
You’re the NOW feature in town,
You’re the number 1 leader
With Sylverling's Crown!

When you’re a Det,
You’re the swingin’est thing.
Little shoat, you’re a man;
Little man, you’re a Steward!

The Dets are in gear,
Our mouses are a-ready’!
The Benefactors’ll steer clear
‘Cause every Orderly's
A lousy sissy!

Here come the Dets
Like a bNick out of hell
Someone gets in our way
Someone don’t feel so well!
Here come the Dets:
Little net, step aside!
Better log off TNN,
Better run, better hide!

We’re drawin’ the line,
So keep your DP hidden!
We’re hangin’ a sign
Says “Orderlies forbidden”--
And we ain’t kiddin!
Here come the Dets,
Yeah! And we’re gonna get
Every last buggin’ site
On the whole buggin’ Net!

One the whole!
Buggin’--!
Ever --!
Lovin’--!
Net!!"

(I propose that as a shortened version of Destroyer, we use Det, short for Detonator. Because it fits better with the song. And that's much too long.)

You fool! You fell victim to one of the classic blunders! The most famous is never get involved in a mine war on Google, but only slightly less well-known is this: never go in against a Vigilante when DP is on the line!

And because someone has to:
"I love the smell of bacon in the morning...smelled like victory"

Every time a ping rings, an angel gets DP

They seek it here, they seek it there, those Shoaties seek it everywhere. Is it in heaven or is it in hell? That damned, elusive, DP.

Raising his nose in the air, the fox said, "I'm sure the DP is sour."

"It’s better to keep your mouth shut and give the impression that you’re a shoat than to open it and remove all doubt."
- Mark Twain

"A bedouin cannot be comfortable without his own armor."
- Mark Twain

"'Nading is the best policy - when there is bacon in it." - ?

“All of us are shoats in the laboratory of GameLayers."
- Tennessee Williams

"There’s only two men I trust. One of ‘em’s me, the other one’s not Bloody Tuesday..." - From Con Air

“You seem somewhat familiar; have I 'naded you before?”
- From Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl

“Shoat is as shoat does” - ?

"Thomas Hoggins always said, "Life was like a crate in the wild. You never know what you're gonna get."

"Bloody Tuesday always said, "T' net was like a mine in the wild. You ne'r know when you're gonna get 'naded."
- From Forrest Gump

"What is the Nethernet? Control. The Nethernet is a computer-generated dream world built to turn a human being into this. *Holds up a bacon*" - From The Matrix

"You take the Perez pill, the story ends, you wake up in his bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the bacon pill, you stay in the Nethernet, and I show you how deep the portal goes." - From The Matrix

"You'd best start believing in PMOG, little shoat. You're in one."
- From Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl

"I know what you're thinking. "Did he fire six 'nades or only five? Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement I kind of lost track myself. But being as this is a large stockpile of 'nades, the most powerful tool in the Nethernet, and would blow your bacon clean off, you've got to ask yourself a question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, shoat?" - From Dirty Harry

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Say your prayers little shoat

Don't forget, my newbie

To include everyone

Tuck you in, warm within your armor

Keep you free from 'nades

Till JamesCannon he comes

Sleep with one eye open

Gripping your DPs tight

Exit light

Enter night

Take my mine

Off to Nether Nether land

Somethings wrong, shut the light

Heavy thoughts tonight

And they aren't of shiny DPs

Dreams of 'nades, dreams of destroyers

Dreams of JamesCannon's fire

And of things that will singe

Sleep with one eye open

Gripping your DPs tight

Exit light

Enter night

Take my mine

Off to nether nether land

Now I lay me down to sleep

Pray the lord my bacon to keep

If I'm 'naded before I wake

Pray the lord my bacon to take

Hush little shoat, don't say a word

And never mind that noise you heard

Its just JamesCannon under your bed,

In your closet, in your head

Exit light

Enter night

Rain of fire

Exit light

Enter night

Take my mine

Were off to nether nether land

Enter Sandman - Metallica
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A DP invested will get you a mine in a crate

If shoats can wear top hats, who says they can't fly

Another day older and deeper in Nicks

Choose PMOG. Choose a tool. Choose a class. Choose a guild. Choose a f**king big crate, choose 'asplody crates, 'nades, bedouin armour and electrical St nicks. Choose good jaunts, high ratings, and portal chains. Choose farming data points. Choose a forum game. Choose your allies. Choose avatars and profile quotes. Choose a puzzle mission on web comics in a range of f**king styles. Choose the forums and wondering why the f*ck you're playing on a Friday night. Choose clicking on that stumble button viewing mind-numbing, spirit-crushing art portfolios, stuffing f*cking junk food into your mouth. Choose tripping your own mines, earning your dp in a miserable solitude, nothing more than an embarrassment to the self-righteous, community spirited forum users who look down on you.

Choose your future.

Choose PMOG.

When life gives you mines, make DP

99 sets of crates on the site, 99 sets of crates... you loot the thing, and you get 10 ping, 98 sets of crates on the site.

All the great things are simple, and many can be expressed in a single word: DP, ping, crates, missions, armor (Winston Churchill)

Research your own nethernet, absorb what is missions, reject what is mines, add what is specifically your profile. The forums are outside of all fixed patterns.

sung to the tune of hokey pokey: you puts your DP in the crate, other people take it out of the crate, you put more DP in the crate, and you upgrade it all about. They take out a skeleton key, and rob you of your money. That's what its all about! Hokey Pokey

Geekydude1, please edit your post when you're adding in new quotes. This is said specifically in the rules :P

No biz like TNN biz, no biz like shoat biz at all

"We will rule over all this land, and we will call it... 'PMOG'."
"I think we should call it...The Nethernet!"
"Ah, curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal!"

"I don't believe there's a power in the 'verse that can stop Shyiskhar from being cheerful."

"Well they tell you: never Nick a man real time. But it is, on occasion, hilarious."

"And Kaylee, what the hell's goin' on in the engine room? Were there destroyers? Some terrifying space destroyers maybe got loose?"

"Sure. It would be humiliating. Having to lie there while the better man refuses to spill your blood. Mercy is the mark of a great man. (tosses a grenade) Guess I'm just a good man. (tosses another grenade) Well, I'm all right."

"Keaton always said, 'I don't believe in God, but I'm afraid of him.' Well I believe in God, and the only thing that scares me is Drudge. "

"Don't be so proud of this mission you've constructed. The power to catalog the web is insignificant next to the power of Chaos"

"It loots the crates with mines within or else it gets the 'nade again!"

-alt-

"It puts the armor on its skin, or else the mine explodes again!"

"That'll do shoat, that'll do..."

"Is that a lightpost in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?"

“My God. I haven’t been mined like that since Seer school.”

show me the dp show me the dp

A portal expired last night and nobody cares. Nobody cares but me.

Give me bacon for the player. I'll produce information. Grenade unnecessary.

Never compromise. Not even in the face of the Tool Trifecta.

Loot my grits!

Beam me down, Craug!

To boldy go where no Seer has gone before!

Superman exists! And he's a Benefactor!

I can mine anything you can mine better than you! No you can't! Yes I can! No you can't! *flame war*

It's the end of the nethernet as we know it! And I'll just mine!

Can't read my RT Nicker Face! My RT N-N-N-Nicker Face! My RT N-N-N-Nicker face!

One two, Nade him through. Three, four, read the lore. Five six, lay some Nicks. Seven, eight, A mine got through; you're a little late. Nine, ten, get outta the shoat pen!

"My Mama always said, 'Life was like a crate from Bloody Tuesday; you never know what you're gonna get.'"

"It's 106 miles to Stumbleupon, we have a case full of 'nades, half a packet of portals, it's double DP, and we're wearing armour... HIT IT!"

wow, I edited my post with that same Blues Brothers quote while you were typing.

Beam me up, Seer.

1. Let's give this boy a crate.

What? No. We can't stop here. This is 'nade country. (Gonzo&Raoul, Fear and Loathing in LV)

2. Let's put a portal on that page! (Joker, Dark Knight)

3. I can't believe I tripped a mine like that. (Carl, Yes Man)

4. Want some bacon?
No man, I don't nade shoats.
Are you a Steward?
Nah, I ain't a Steward, I just don't pick on shoats, that's all.
Why not?
Shoats are clumsy animals. I don't pick on clumsy animals.
Bacon tastes gooood. Shoats taste gooood. (Jules&Vince, Pulp Fiction)

5. Oh, I'm sorry, did I break your armor? (Jules, Pulp Fiction)

6. Who wants some snacks? You do. (Deadpool, after inserting a grenade in The Hulk's mouth)

7. And the Lord spoke, saying, "First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Pmogia towards thy Bedouin, who, being naughty in my sight, shall Foil it." (Monty Python and the Holy Grail)

8. I must not wear armor. Armor is the DP-killer.
Nades are the little-death that bring total obliteration.
I will face the nades. I will permit them to pass over me and through me.
And when they have gone past I will turn to the shoppe to get some nicks.
When the nades have gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain. (1k DP from me if you know where this is from; Riko got it; The Litany against Fear, Dune)

Haha love the F&L one! seven7seven FTW! ^_^

the crate is a lie
--
'lante, leave them 'nades alone!(Pink Floyd- We don't need no education)

This is a Ballistic St. Nick, the most powerful St. Nick in the world, and would blow your armor clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?

Adding another one and will continue to update this post as I think of more:

These are not the tools you're looking for

Armor is futile. You will be 'naded

Three mines for the TNN Players under the sky
Seven for the NPC's in their halls of stone
Nine for Mortal Shoat doomed to fry
One for Burdenday on his dark throne
In the land of Gamelayers where the PMOG's lie.

"I love it when a mission comes together"

"Nicks its my new obsession
Yeah
Nicks its not even a question"

"What's The Nethernet comming to?"

"Now let me ask you a question, Tuesday. When you drove in here, did you notice a sign out in front that said, 'Dead destroyer storage?"